The Magic Question

You may not know this about me, but I love to read! I especially love to read in a hammock while camping in the summer, hopefully with an alpine lake nearby. (I’ll be honest. Sometimes reading leads to a nap in that hammock.) I also love to read near a warm fire on a snowy evening. However, most of the time, I am reading before bed at night.

Of the books I read this summer, I keep thinking about The Lazy Genius Way by Kendra Adachi. In it, she outlines the principles of being a “lazy genius” – being genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. I was surprised that many of the 13 principles mentioned in her book are right in line with supporting executive functions. She basically wrote an executive function book. (I wonder if she knows!)

The one that I keep coming back to is called the Magic Question. She suggests frequently asking ourselves, “What can I do now to make life easier later?” As a mom, one of the first things that came to mind was dinner. What can I do now (i.e. early in the day) to make dinner easier later? Perhaps chop the veggies, make the salad dressing, thaw the chicken. Great idea! She argues that you can “magic question” anything.

As an Executive Function coach, what came to mind is a saying that I tell my clients all the time – Be kind to future you. I give lots of examples:

·      Future you will appreciate if you write all important school dates on your calendar now. (If you wonder how I feel about calendars, let’s talk about calendars!)

·      Future you will appreciate if you put your backpack where it belongs (so you can find it).

·      Future you will appreciate if you do the assignment now that is due at the end of the week.

·      Future you will appreciate if you put your phone away for a while, so you can truly focus.

·      Future you will appreciate if you write down the things you need to do (so you don’t forget).

·      Future you will appreciate if you make your lunch and/or set out your clothes the night before.

·      Future you will appreciate if you tackle the chores immediately after getting home, so you don’t have to do them later in the evening.

Be kind to future you. Thinking about “future you” is a metacognitive strategy to help make life easier. It’s just as Adachi says – do something now to make life easier later.

This is such great advice! But there’s something else.

First, we must pause. The ever-critical pause. So much of life is lived on auto-pilot. We are often going a mile a minute all day long. If we can just pause for a moment, it gives us the opportunity to make a different, and perhaps better, choice. And “future you” will appreciate that.

And, always remember: We must be gentle with ourselves. Change is not fast. It’s little by little that change happens.